� 2001-2006 by Shiloh
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blankI got to thinking last night in bed. When I was doing last night's entry, I was having major brain lapses (a.k.a. a bad case of dislexia and writer's vanity from my earlier endeavors on the willow tree folktale I'm doing--I want it to be gggoooddd, in other words: perfect). I remembered belatedly how I was thinking, ever since I first heard this song by Celine Dion--and it became my latest favorite--I wanted to add it here in my journal. But to get the full power of it, in my opinion, I needed to add the mp3 file with the words. So I've waited, and now that I have it I happily pass on the power and magic to you... Turn on your speakers please, if they're not on.
I'm AliveI first heard this song as an accompaniment to a slideshow of some of the more beautiful and breathtaking places on Earth. As I listened to the lyrics and looked at the pictures I started to cry. Though it's a love song, it's also a song of joy. About being alive. She's soaring, happy, in love with life. Once upon a time, in my days at Ricks, I felt this way myself. It was the most awesome feeling in the world. I loved life, I loved myself and for the most part I was truly happy. Life was great...or at least, it was good. I gained a healthy dose of self-esteem and found out I didn't need to be anybody but myself for people to like me. And I gained my own testimony of the truth of Christ's gospel. It was all a wonderful discovery.
Mmmmm...mmmmm...
Mmmmmmmmmmmm
I get wings to fly
Oh, oh...I'm alive...
YeahWhen you call on me
When I hear you breathe
I get wings to fly
I feel that I'm aliveWhen you look at me
I can touch the sky
I know that I'm alive
Mmmmm ohhhhh ahhhhhhWhen you bless the day
I just drift away
All my worries die
I'm glad that I'm
AliveYou've set my heart on fire
Filled me with love
Made me a woman
On clouds above
(Yeah...)I couldn't get
Much higher
My spirit takes flight
'Cause I am alive(When you call on me)
When you call on me
(When I hear you breathe)
When I hear you breathe
I get wings to fly
(Fly)
I feel that I'm alive
(I am alive)(When you reach for me)
When you reach for me
Raising spirits high
God knows that
That I'll be the one
Standing by
Through good and
Through trying timesAnd it's only begun
I can't wait for the
Rest of my life(When you call on me)
When you call on me
(When you reach for me)
When you reach for me
I get wings to fly
(Fly)
(I feel that I'm alive)
Aaahhhh(When you bless the day)
When you bless, you bless the day
(I just drift away)
I just drift away
(All my worries die)
I know that I'm alive
YeahI get wings to fly
God knows that I'm alive...Celine Dion
Then I graduated and took a step closer to entering the world. I moved away from home and started ISU. I was so na�ve, looking back now, I wasn't prepared for the temptations I faced. Or the weakness I soon discovered. A weakness I'm still battling today, eight years later.
Emma just asked me what it is I hope to achieve this year. I hate making resolutions, because in the past, despite every good intention I had, I never remembered the goals I made or I lost interest in them. I hate feeling like a failure. ('Course, I don't know of anyone who loves that feeling. *soft laugh*) So, I quit making them. Instead, I've tried to take one day at a time, making small goals I can accomplish in a day, a week, or in a month's time.
But this year, as it started I found myself with a desire to accomplish several things regarding my writing and with a desire to be better, to feel like I once did at Ricks, like this song makes you feel. I want to get a few pieces I've started in the past completed, like the Medusa myth and a Samhain ghost tale; I want to see what it would take to get something published. And I know I can never be the same as I once was--nobody can--but my goal, if I dare say the word, is to have that awesome feeling once again. I know it can be achieved. I can be similar to the person I once was...the difference is I'm older and hopefully wiser and stronger.
