Here's another "Why" question for ya: Why, in Heaven's name, must "sexy" be an all-important word or standard? Can anybody answer this for me? Please?

I mean, really now, almost everything I hear or see anymore is judged by how sexy it is or it isn't. Including my generation. You're either sexy...or you're not. And if you're not, you're a dud, a wallflower, a fixture in the background; you're invisible.

All that seems to matter mostly anymore in this day and age are looks. Having a sexy body; having sexy clothes. The message coming across, at least to me, from seeing advertisements for beer, tires, online dating sites and makeover shows (to name a few) is that sex appeal is vital. Without it, your chances of finding happiness and companionship with that special someone for the rest of your life aren't probably going to be in the highest percentile.

Women need nice, plump, firm breasts, toned and sleek abs and a nice round, firm posterior, with toned, sleek legs that seem to go on forever to be considered sexy. Men need firm, muscular pecs, arms and legs, a six-pack, lean hips, a tight butt and well-endowed family jewels to be considered sexy. It's well and good to be in shape, fit and healthy. You honestly feel good inside and out. But it's another thing to focus on sex appeal only. What is wrong with seeking to know a person first for their mind or their sense of humor?

I know, I know; it's no secret what I am with a question like that. I'm a wallflower. And frankly, beyond what can be or has been done--adding a touch of makeup, getting a new improved and updated hairdo and wardrobe--I don't care. As I stated yesterday, I like myself. I'm not gonna stand on pretenses, trying out the new fads and styles and do what's "sexy" and cool, just to be "sexy."

It irks me to see people using sex appeal to sell tires, of all things, and beer! I don't know what tire or automobile company advertises their tires with two couples dancing slowly and evocatively in the rain, one couple blonde and dressed in white, the other dark-haired and dressed in black, but it's pathetic! Another example is either Samuel Adams or Miller beer. It's a bar scene commercial with good-looking people bellied up to the bar with beer bottles or cans in their hands. Women are dressed "sexy" with midriffs and thighs showing, and lips are invitingly run over with pink tongues in acts that're supposed to be sensual.

Don't these advertising agencies have anymore imagination that they have to resort to using sex to sell their clients' products? I know why they use it: sex is an aphrodisiac and therefore sells. In advertising there are three words that catch people's attention: free, sex and money. If anything includes either of those three things and is in someone's favor then, hot dang! it's sold, guaranteed.

Perhaps what gets me the most are the banner ads I see online for online dating sites and makeover shows that talk about becoming sexy. In recent weeks on a game site I visit constantly, I've seen two banners frequently displayed. They're advertising for Singles.com or some such dating site. Their main attention getter is a shot of some buxom woman's chest straining to be free from the blouse that reveals, oh so "sexily" and cleverly, her generous cleavage. (Well, maybe if she buttoned her blouse the rest of the way with one or two buttons left undone, she wouldn't be in danger of popping out of it the rest of the way.) The tagline for this classy banner is "We're busting at the seams with singles!" *rolls eyes*

I dunno. I'm probably being too prudish, but when I see such commercials as the tire one and hear "sexy this...sexy that..." as often as I have, it just irks me no end, because it's sending the shallow message of "You need to be sexy to be noticed and to count. Your chances of remaining alone are greater if you don't have sex appeal."

But the truth is, having sex appeal and beauty on the outside is no guarantee for constant and true and faithful companionship and love, if there is nothing of substance on the inside.

moon phase