� 2001-2006 by Shiloh
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Mike and Jen are celebrating three years today as well. Happy Anniversary to both couples. *loving smile*
I squirreled this away because the last question niggles at me and I was going to wait till I didn't feel too guilty about answering it. But then the last two...three? weeks have shown me that I'll never be ready. I'm only human and I'll falter every now and then. Judgment Day will have come and gone before I ever felt ready. So I'm diving in now.
Actually this prompt is a good one for me right now. It sums up my year, well the past 11 years spiritually, quite well. I love my church, I know it's true and I wouldn't trade it for another religion. I grew up in an active, fairly strong LDS home, and as a child I believed the Church was true. It's easy, I think, to live off your parents' or family's knowledge or faith as a child, because until you reach a certain age they dominate or influence much of what you do. Oh sure, I had my own faith, but not a certain knowledge. However, you can only live or go on faith for so long before you need something more.
My testimony came later than it does for some. 'Course, I didn't leave the nest for the first time till I was 21. So I still had my family's faith to bolster mine. College really was when I gained my testimony, it was actually the start of my self-discovery. (Yes! I'm still stuck on that subject.) It didn't come overnight or in a sudden epiphany but gradually. It was a slow realization or confirmation through a series of experiences throughout my life. The church is true.
What do your actions show about the God, Higher Power, Great Mystery you believe in?
Well, in the past year they haven't shown much. But in the past 11 years...you can see the peaks and valleys of my spiritual self quite well through my actions. The peaks are when I've lived as we're asked: praying every night and some mornings when I've had time or remembered, paying tithing, reading scriptures and attending my church meetings and activities. The lows or valleys, of course, are when I've faltered: not prayed, not paid tithing, not read the scriptures and missed my meetings.
In answer to the first question, I guess my actions show I'm a human who believes in Christ and his teachings. Humans are not perfect and we do falter, but the important thing is to keep trying to move forward, to be better in our weak areas.
How do your actions fail to show what you truly believe?
This is an excellent question now that I'm giving it some thought, instead of letting guilt override my logic. Actions are deceiving, or can be, I think. Yes, they speak louder than words, but they can be deceiving. How so? Well, this question applies mostly to this past year. A year in which I've not prayed often, nor paid any tithing, nor read the scriptures and have only attended a small smattering of meetings. To the eye this is a low, definitely. But what these actions have hidden is my testimony. My knowledge, my faith in Christ and the gospel principles. I haven't lost those. And I've begun to pray again, but that is an action nobody sees. I do it in private. Thus, my actions can be deceiving.
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moon phase |
